This is the tale of my sojourn,
of my travails and trials under the roof of my master,
the pains and the grief I faced daily,
my soul has grown weak, weary.
I have been desecrated.
A tale of strong will broken into pieces, torn into shreds.
my essence is burnt, seared, nothing more than blackened embers.
I laugh, yes, crying no longer holds meaning.
You are tired, but what other choice than to be strong?
Strength is but an illusion, pain is it’s very allusion.
I tell him to stop, he says I should shut up. I gave my consent to continue, he said I’m a great fool.
my memory is filled to the brim with darkness, he hungrily thrusts and fills me with his seed.
the world only pays attention only when they’ve seen countering reactions.
We are all bumbling blundering hypocrites, I am part, I care only about my own suffering.
Oh! Why does the sun continue to rise each day? someone should put it out.
darkness is better than continuing to see that face.
That face that has wrought anger on me,
those hands that rent my soul to shreds and made life the worst gift I ever had,
could there be someone listening to my song?
can’t anyone hear my cry from the streets and come to my aid?
Happiness seemed like a long lost antique, even if I should get it back,
will I still know how to use it? there isn’t any love in this world other than lust and more lust.
how do I tell his wife?
what need will I say that this man desires with my 15 year old body that she has not fulfilled a hundred times and one?
I have more questions, don’t get tired to read.
My mind is no more, I need you to help me think.
I am now far less than a woman, shouldn’t every human be allowed to live?
I begin to wonder. When has womanhood turned into a crime?
I was told by mother that this was a gift from nature to be celebrated not maltreated, perhaps that was all a lie to sooth my naive mind?
was I being fooled by my own beloved mother? Were her words just out of the lips and not her heart?
Oh! how else will I raise my voice to cry, even his wife tells me all my words are lies!!
she doubts my confession even as I swear on my own life. well, I know it is no longer mine.
I have fallen into an ordeal, all I’ll see is doom.
Death is inevitable, that should be our constant thought.
death is an equalizer, for abuser and abused. Ignorant and feigned ignorance!
My time is near, I have come to terms with my lot. My fate
the time is right, the signs say truly it is time for the transition. May Hades be kinder.
surely death will soothe my soul more than life, may my soul find rest on my journey to the world beyond, or maybe contribute to mother earth’s very own elements.
Listen to my cries birds of the air, pay attention to my sobs you insects that cry in the night, maybe my freedom lies in your intercession.
have I asked too much that you can’t offer me?
all I need is beyond my grip and reach, even death has turned its face away from me.
May hades never sleep until my soul finds retribution, may the earth never find peace until someone hearken to my wails!
I know, I’m insane. Goodness! tears again?
I guess that’s all that is expected of me at the peak of all my troubles, I give my last cry, please hearken unto my plea.
this is all I have to say to you sons of men, let not lust build a beast in you.
And to my kind, molested and desecrated, be strong for out of your troubles comes the gift forever treasured by time.
DESECRATED was born out of the pains of maltreatment of servants by their masters, the spate of child molestation, rape, and general demeaning of the female gender by their masters. The poem recounts the story of a young girl who had gone through too much in the hands of her masters, a lot of ill treatments. She curses everyone in her anger, everyone and everything, towards the end she beckons the sons of men to do better for themselves, after which she retires to the cold hands of death.
© Maji McCoy and Silas Nathson